Trog's Tavern: Roman Numerals Are Dumb

Herein lies the various threads in which our characters live out their lives
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Re: Trog's Tavern: Roman Numerals Are Dumb

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"My dragon friend Kara's uncle offered to help me with my dream of being a big strong dragonperson.
But he messed up the process and made me a dragon-qilin instead. Apparently qilins are very soft.

That is also probably why he has fancy flowing mustaches. Qilins are definitely known for those.
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Re: Trog's Tavern: Roman Numerals Are Dumb

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"Oh wow really?" Aivu replies, full of wonder and curiosity. "Where you a tiny scrawny dragonperson before? I'm a tiny skinny dragondragon but that helps me sneak into cupboards when no one is looking," she confides in G'Nichi as she continues her tail grooming.

"Having a dragon friend is important since dragons make every adventure better. I've played that important role for my side-kick Eu! What would she do if she didn't have a smart cute clever dragon like me around to get her out of trouble?"

"Tackle my problems in a state of abject dragonlessness," shouts Eu from across the tavern.

"And that would be so sad! It makes me want to cry just thinking about it. I've never met a qilin before are they as fluffy as you?"
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Re: Trog's Tavern: Roman Numerals Are Dumb

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"I was...well to put it bluntly I was lizardfolk small enough to be routinely mistaken for a kobold."
Not that there's anything wrong with kobolds! Nichi just isn't one!
"I like to think I've gotten a few people out of trouble. Buh well, I've never actually seen a qilin in person. So I don't know. I guess they must or where did all of this come from?" he asks, gesturing at his tail.
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Re: Trog's Tavern: Roman Numerals Are Dumb

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"That sounds like fun! I've met a kobold once he was as mysterious as he was small. Even smaller than me, even!" Aivu replies, bobbing her head along to a tune she begins humming. "I haven't ever met a lizardfolk, though. Big ones or little ones. How come you wanted to turn into something else? When havoc dragons get older they can turn into other people, too! I've made a list of people I want to try turning into for reasons that aren't related to framing them for stealing cookies."

That would be just terrible.

Aivu would never do anything like that.

"That sounds neat, though, what kind of trouble have you gotten people out of? Have you had any adventures?"
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Re: Trog's Tavern: Roman Numerals Are Dumb

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"Well, it's always been my dream to be one of Bahamut's great and heroic paladins. Being big and strong and dragony is you know. Part of the whole thing.
...
Also I was told that I was going to be stuck with random things trying to fight me for the foreseeable future due to the curse on my bracelet so I thought I would have a longer life expectancy if I was physically capable."

G'nichi looks a little awkward at the question.
"Well, we've had bandit attacks, random zombie attacks, shadow-occupied temples. And one particular deadly time loop game imprisoning some sort of outer god. That one was pretty unpleasant so probably not that story."
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Re: Trog's Tavern: Roman Numerals Are Dumb

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Tourist Trap
"Uh, sorry, no." Sekhmet doesn't eat those often. "That, uh, sounds like my mother." She's not convinced by Eu's explanation. Then she's asked about the goddess Sekhmet. "I guess so? But I've never heard of an 'Osiran' before." She doesn't know much about her namesake anyway.
A picture is offered! "I guess?" She returns to her natural shape. If Eu wants to get her picture with a minor celebrity (even if she doesn't recognize her), now's the time.
Relatedly, Sekhmet is pointedly not looking at the magazine rack where an old tabloid from a couple months ago bears her face on the cover.
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Re: Trog's Tavern: Roman Numerals Are Dumb

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"One of who's great and heroic paladins? You don't want to be one of the stuffy boring sorts of paladins, do you?" Aivu asks, her long tail wagging back and forth as she puts the finishing touches on the bells. "Stuffy boring paladins are soooooo boring! They would yell at me when I filled their boots with jelly. Can you believe that? Yelling at innocent little me!"

A travesty is what that is.

"Oh yuck I hate fighting zombies. I always brush my teeth after biting monsters but I brush them TWICE when it's zombies. What were the bandits like? Did they yell 'your money or your life!' really loudly?"


[Tourist Trap]

"Darn. Well, I tried. I guess I won't be able to believe that you're a regular human, then,"
Eu laments. "Your mom must have been a real piece of work. You know, I met a succubus queen sort myself, too. But one of my friends convinced her to abandon her evil ways and she ended up becoming the patron of outcasts and exiles. It actually worked out pretty well for everyone involved. I hear the succubus who took over after she left is doing a terrible job, though."

Then?

She'll scoot up along side Sekhmet, put an arm around her should, and say-

"Smile for the camera!"
as she holds it awkwardly in front of the two of them to take a picture.

Once that's done she muses, "You know I can't help but notice that you were talking about repenting before I crashed your conversation by rudely existing nearby. I might be able to offer a little advice on that subject as a totally normal mortal who definitely isn't a goddess of any kind. I think that would be a fair trade for the photo."

Definitely not.
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Re: Trog's Tavern: Roman Numerals Are Dumb

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"Uh. Bahamut? Apsu? Divine platinum dragon, very nice, doesn't get along with a certain five-headed dragon?" He has a few names.
G'nichi turns to the have dragon fully so he can wiggle his toes at her.
"Well as you can see that can't happen to us because I don't own shoes to fill with jelly." he assures her as if that makes perfect sense.
"I am trying to not come across as the stuffy sort. One of many reasons I don't wear my armor everywhere. Does this outfit make me seem boring?" G'nichi gestures at the simple outfit he's wearing. One of the ones Syncope gave him, it's a pretty plain top and pants made to look just a little expensive. His shiny celestial bracelet stands out.
"The thieves tried to rob me and my friend Kara, but I had a knife at the time that let me see the future. So I beat them up pretty easily and told them to buzz off. Which they did."
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Re: Trog's Tavern: Roman Numerals Are Dumb

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Tourist Trap
Sekhmet smiles awkwardly as the photo is taken.
"She was. You have no idea..." Well, Eu probably has some idea. But to be related, the daughter of such a monster? That's an entirely different level of awful.
"I, uh, yes. I recently inherited, uh, a kingdom of Hell." Not that recently. It's been almost 2 years. "I'm, uh, trying to reform the demons there to be, uh, less awful." That's a nice, simple summary that doesn't really get into all the details of why it's so difficult.
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Re: Trog's Tavern: Roman Numerals Are Dumb

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"Oh. That's a silly sounding name for Apsu. It sounds like a name for a dog," Aivu laughs. "And I've got a story too! One time me and Eu helped hatch one of Apsu's long lost sons who stayed in his egg for just SO LONG on our adventures! There was this black dragon who transformed into an archeologist and he tricked us into helping him find the place Jharsy was hidden (that's his name I'm basically his big sister) and I had to beat up the black dragon to save the silver dragon who was guarding Jharsy from all the evil dragons who wanted to teach him to be mean! And I GUESS Eu and her other friends helped a little."

Maybe even more than a little. "I don't think your outfit is boring! But it COULD use some more bells and ribbons. And maybe some glittery parts."

Then Aivu gives a little gasp. "You have a KNIFE that lets you see the FUTURE!? Quick! What's my future going to be like? Am I ever going to remember where I buried my eggshell bits? Oh oh! When I learn how to transform will I be able to fool anyone into thinking I'm actually Eu?"

These are deeply important questions.

[Tourist Trap]

Yes.

Eu absolutely has a friend who's pretty much just like Sekhmet. The personalities are so similar it's just adorable.

But also! Yes. Some idea. Again, the demon lords that she's met have been pretty terrible. With one exception. Well, really really REALLY technically two exceptions. But neither of those people are demon lords anymore so nyeh.

"Okay time out," Eu says, making a little T with her hands. "You have a kingdom in Hell. Or... a queendom. I guess? But you're trying to reform the demons there. In Hell. There are demons in Hell in need of being reformed? I'm not exactly an expert but my understanding is the only reason there are ever demons in Hell is because a demon lord has managed to master cat-herding and has launched an invasion into Hell from the Abyss to slaughter a bunch of devils."

"Different cosmologies!" Zee helpfully points out as she sets a bowl of salad in front of Eu. "Different hell. Different definition of demons and devils. Don't worry about it too much."

"Oh,"
Eu mutters back as she forks at her salad absently. "Huh. Okay, well, sure. Demons are still basically... what's left of evil mortal souls, right? After they die? Because my advicery is going to get really sketchy if it turns out demons are actually just really rude potted plants."
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Re: Trog's Tavern: Roman Numerals Are Dumb

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”Well, if that’s true I must thank you for your service to my patron. I would have very much liked to meet this hatchling.”
G’nichi nods.
”And I have been looking at accessories.” he indicates the magazine.

”I don’t have the knife with me! And it was only a few seconds into the future. My bracelet gives me one magic item at a time and I don’t get to pick. Mostly. So I don’t have the special knife today.”
Nichi explains. Well he could but he isn’t testing it since then he’d have to carry it around. And also he could get that stupid katana again.
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Re: Trog's Tavern: Roman Numerals Are Dumb

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Tourist Trap
"Right. The, uh, most evil and most powerful ones." So not just anyone can become a demon, but only the worst of the worst. "Gain power by being horrible and, uh, consuming other souls. They make deals for living mortals' souls and are served by cultists... Uh, does that sound right so far?"
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Re: Trog's Tavern: Roman Numerals Are Dumb

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"You're welcome! We did a really great job of beating up that evil dragon. And I've been teaching Jharsy how to be a good dragon and how to play pranks and the best kinds of cakes to eat. He didn't come with us on our vacation he's still back at home since he's just a little guy," the havoc dragon reports.

One might argue that she is ALSO a little gal, given that she's about the size of a dog. Jharsy is, apparently, even smaller than that.

"He's really nice, though. I'm not sure if he really NEEDS my help to learn to be good since he's all those different metal colors at the same time. But I wouldn't be a very good big sister if I didn't help!"

She puffs out her chest just a little to show how good of a big sister she is.

At the mention of a lack of knife Aivu looks disappointed. When it's reported that it only works a few seconds into the future she looks even MORE disappointed. "Aaww... that doesn't sound like any fun. I guess it would be good for helping you cheat at card games? Or knowing when a baddie is about to shank you. But those things aren't nearly as neat as knowing what sorts of presents you're going to get for you next hatch-day."

[Tourist Trap]


"Hmm, that sounds a little different but mostly the same," Eu replies thoughtfully. "When people get sent to the Abyss for abusing their freedom to do wicked things they become larva."

She then makes a suitably larva-like gesture with her hands, indicating something about the size of a loaf of bread.

"They're these... maggots. With person-faces. And they wriggle around in the filth eating it and each other. I guess they're attracted to eating other larva that committed the same sorts of evil they did? But anyway once they gobble enough of each other up they pupate into a more powerful demon that embodies a particular type of evil. So usually demons don't really remember their mortal lives. Or if they DO it's just fragments and flashes. Usually they have EXTRA trouble remembering all the good parts of life. They're just like this... bundle of wants and destructive impulses. Both to themselves and everyone else. It's really sad."
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Re: Trog's Tavern: Roman Numerals Are Dumb

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Tourist Trap
"That's, uh, gross," Sekhmet responds, blanching a little. "It, uh, works differently for us. Most souls are, uh, dormant. In a state of unending agony without, uh, really being aware of what's happening. But if one is, uh, especially wicked and strong-willed, they can spontaneously mutate into a demon reflecting their sins, with, uh, all their memories and skills intact, and, uh, magical power in addition. It, uh, also refines their, uh, negative drives in a way. They, uh, often become dependent on doing evil, and that only intensifies the more souls they consume and the more powerful they become." But that's not all, "A, uh, powerful demon can also create lesser demons by using the souls they've bought from mortals, or, uh, other souls they have power over. They, uh, get more control over the nature of the new demon and can alter some of their personality and abilities. The, uh, first kind are called, uh, 'feral' demons, and the second are 'courtly,' since they usually are created by, uh, members of the royal court, and, uh, most members of the court are such." Which explains why the succubi and incubi are all so similar to each other, but that question wasn't even asked.
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Re: Trog's Tavern: Roman Numerals Are Dumb

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"A child should never be alone, no matter how capable. It is good that you are there for him."
G'nichi smiles.
"It was very, very good at avoiding getting shanked. But alas, its power extended would be too much for any mortal. After all if I knew what people's reactions would be I wouldn't need this magazine's fashion advice and its writers wouldn't have gotten my three coppers."
It would also cause large problems of free will.
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Re: Trog's Tavern: Roman Numerals Are Dumb

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Aivu puffs up even BIGGER at the praise.

One of the few things she likes more than bragging is people saying how great she is.

"I guess there ARE rules about prophecies not being allowed. And prophecy sort of means people aren't free so that isn't good either,"
Aivu admits. "But knowing what would happen would still be neat. Well it was fun talking to you mister! I hope you can decide which accessories would be nice!"

And then off she prances to decide who to pester next.

Hopefully G'Nichi likes his new bells.

[Tourist Trap]

"Yes," EU confirms definitively. "Yes it is. The Abyss is really gross. It's like a disgusting twisted parody of Elysium. I think it might even be worse than Hell, and Hell is just spirit crushing boring evil; the absolute lack of hope."

Quite possibly the worst.

Then?

She listens to Sekhmet's explanation, humming now and again as she eats her salad, the end of her tail twitching back and forth. Eventually she points her fork (current spearing a tomato) at Sekhmet.

"Yeah that's pretty similar. But I think helping to reform your demons might... actually be easier than the ones from the Abyss? See, one of my friends discovered that if you just bombard them with kindness it can sometimes wake up the tiny flickers of good memories in them. Like blowing on coals to make them glow again. It doesn't work on all of them. Or even most of them. But some of them! And if your demons actually remember being mortal then it sounds like it should be easier to help them remember the dreams the world killed in their lives that set them on the path to perdition."
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Re: Trog's Tavern: Roman Numerals Are Dumb

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"My name is G'nichi. Please, if you ever bring your brother around or want to talk to other dragons, visit Apsu's temple sometime. You have a good day."
Then he goes back to reading his magazine.
He almost seems determined to not move his tail and expose the bells. A slight smile tugs at the edge of his mouth.

Meanwhile!

The shark is still trying to cool off. The wolf seems to have lost interest looking at Aivu and is eating some snacks he ordered during the conversation. The sphinx has solved all the riddles and has moved on to another book.

And there are even people there not played by Keeper!
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Re: Trog's Tavern: Roman Numerals Are Dumb

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Tourist Trap
"I try, but..." Sekhmet looks both skeptical and disheartened. "Many only care about their own power, or pleasure. Some have been causing perpetual hurt for literal millennia. Some want to take advantage of my kindness and seize control. And then... Some just want to watch the world burn." The way she says all that, it's clear Sekhmet knows all too well what some of her subjects have done, and it's not pleasant. "The mind undergoes some sort of, uh, fundamental change on becoming a demon. I don't really understand it, but it's stark. Their worst traits are emphasized and the best are discarded. Some of them are, uh, driven to particular sins, to the point that they, uh, grow weak and die if they can't commit them. It's all a, uh, very awful situation."
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Re: Trog's Tavern: Roman Numerals Are Dumb

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"Okay!" Aivu calls back as she prances away. Hmm. Who else is interesting? Maybe the big shark guy? She'll go with the big shark guy. What sorts of pranks can be played on a big shark guy? She really isn't sure since she has no experience in this field! She'll just have to improvise and or completely make something up as she goes. "Hi! Are you a fish?"

An excellent way to start a conversation, definitely.

[Tourist Trap]

"Yeah it can be hard and most of them won't listen but wait they DIE if they don't commit wickedness? What? Seriously?" Eu replies, somewhat aghast. "Are you SURE? That can't be right. If an outsider starts throwing off... whatever sort of outsider they are then they start turning into the RIGHT kind of outsider that matches their thoughts and deeds. Like one of my friends used to be a succubus but she's a yazata now thanks to her goddess redeeming her. I mean, if the demons where you're from straight up die then I'm not sure how you would ever get around that. Unless they decide to be self-sacrificial all of a sudden."
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Re: Trog's Tavern: Roman Numerals Are Dumb

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Aivu approaches a shark man!
It's noticeably cooler around him compared to the rest of the tavern. Something's probably up with him. But the spooky glow in hollow eye sockets probably indicated that.
"Last time I checked, yeah. I do have gills and lungs which might make me an amphibian? Apparently 'fish' isn't actually a strict thing anyway. Uh. Why?" replies Henry Vadnova
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Re: Trog's Tavern: Roman Numerals Are Dumb

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Tourist Trap
"Outsider? Yazata?" Sekhmet asks, but she's already moving on. "Uh, different cosmology, different rules, I guess," she echoes Zee, but a lot less forcefully, "It's not all of them. I don't have that problem, I don't think my mother did, and I dearly hope my children don't." She sighs. "It doesn't matter to most of them. They enjoy it. They'd do it whether or not they were forced. It's why they're in Hell. Or part of why, at least." Sekhmet looks like she's tired of dealing with a bunch of demons. Maybe she needs a vacation as much as Eu does.
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Re: Trog's Tavern: Roman Numerals Are Dumb

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Brr~!

Why is so chilly by sharky the shark guy?

The cold isn't that much fun, in Aivu's opinion. She much prefers the eternally warm, pleasant starlit evening of Enigma. But! This is an adventure! And sometimes on adventures the weather isn't perfectly perfect. At least it isn't hailing frozen eyeballs, right? That was definitely the least fun weather the little dragon has ever experienced.

"Do frogs have gills?" Aivu wonders aloud. She isn't sure of that one. She tried catching a frog once but it hopped away and peed on her. She really didn't have a chance to check if it had gills. "Because my sidekick Eu says we're sight seeing! And you're quite a sight."

Very true.

A large, round, cold sight.

"Are you sight seeing too? Do you know if there are any chocolate trees nearby?"

[Tourist Trap]

"Anyone from the outer planes. You know, Heaven and Hell. Elysium and the Abyss. And all those part-neutral planes no one cares about," Eu says, waving a dismissive hand at the four neutral planes that no one cares about nor ever will. "Different cosmologies, right. I guess you've just got Heaven and Hell. That's PROBABLY easier to keep track of, really. Way less complicated. Are you evil? Hell. Are you good? Heaven! Nice and simple."

Eu hums at Sekhmet's explanation, looking thoughtful. "Y'know if there's one thing I've learned from demons it's that they don't enjoy it. They hate everything. And usually they hate themselves most of all. But they hide their own pain by hurting others and laughing about it. They're still people; just broken and hurting people. And you know what they say, hurt people hurt people. The first step to redeeming them has always been getting them to admit that they're miserable and maybe they don't have to be."
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Re: Trog's Tavern: Roman Numerals Are Dumb

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Luckily for Aivu but sadly for Henry, it isn't actually COLD around him. Just colder. It's more of a SPOOKY CHILL except it isn't spooky because instead of it being ominously chilly around a mysterious spot in your house it's around this shark who probably couldn't scare a six year old.
"I hope a good sight?" remarks the shark hopefully.
"No, they lose them when they become frogs. Um. No, I live here. I don't think I've seen any cocoa farms in Inside. Most of them are probably out in the country somewhere. Why?"
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Re: Trog's Tavern: Roman Numerals Are Dumb

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Tourist Trap
Sekhmet shakes her head. "I know, but they've been intentionally blinded to it My domain is a, uh, gilded cage. My subjects obsess over, uh, carnal pleasures. As far as they're concerned, they're as far from hurting as possible. And I've, uh, seen into their minds." Rarely. The mind of a demon is not a pleasant place. "My mother... She did something to her their minds to keep control of them... And to keep them engaged in her depravity." It's clear there's a lot of bad blood between Sekhmet and her mother. But the good news is, if Sekhmet inherited the kingdom, that monster must be no more. "I'd love to cure them, but I don't know how. I don't even know if it's possible. And unlike my mother, I don't want to alter anyone's mind without their consent."
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Re: Trog's Tavern: Roman Numerals Are Dumb

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Hey.

Some six year olds think sharks are scary.

Maybe not THAT SHARK specifically but you never know. Kids can be scared of some pretty dumb things sometimes.

"Hmmm..." Aivu hums, considering Henry's question very seriously. "Well, in Elysium usually good things are beautiful! Or pretty or handsome. Or sometimes even cute like meeeeeee~"

The young havoc dragon strikes a pose that she thinks looks cute.

"I don't think you look like THAT sort of good. But maybe you're a sort of good that looks different? Are you a good fish, Mister Fish?"

More excellent questions.

"Oh a question for me! I know the answer to that one. I really really really really want to find a chocolate tree and bite some of its chocolate leaves off!"

Will Henry have the heart to tell the young chocolate tree enthusiast that chocolate trees are not, in fact, made of chocolate?

[Tourist Trap]

Eu makes a repulsed face, both at the description and at the mind messing and even at the talk of freedom.

"Ugh. That place sounds even more gross by the moment. Too bad you can't just burn it down and start over, haha," she says, only half joking here. "It sounds like these demons are slaves to me. Slaves to their lust. Okay, so, freedom is really important in Elysium, right? We're the plane of goodness and freedom. But see, there are different SORTS of freedom-"

She begins ticking off fingers.

"There's liberty. The freedom to do what you OUGHT to do. The freedom to do good. To live out every kind whim you have. To create beauty. The freedom to be THE BEST you that you can be. That's the sort of freedom we have in Elysium."

Then she ticks off another finger.

"There's also autonomy. The freedom of sovereignty over yourself. Self rule. Doing your own thing and following the dictates of your heart. Maybe they're impulses toward peace and stability. Maybe they're impulses toward revolution and change. Maybe they're a bit of both? That's the freedom of Maelstrom."

Then comes the third finger.

"And finally there's anarchy. The freedom to destroy freedom. The freedom to enslave. The freedom to ruin. That's the freedom of the Abyss. And that sounds like it's maybe the freedom of your Hell, too. These demons think they're free to follow their pleasures, but actually they're slaves to them."
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Re: Trog's Tavern: Roman Numerals Are Dumb

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Tourist Trap
Sekhmet listens with intent, and after the final statement, nods. "That's exactly right." She sounds sad when she says it. "But they don't know, I can't teach them, and if I used the same methods as were used by my mother, I wouldn't be any better than her. I need them to change of their own will, but their wills are already, uh, compromised against it."
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Re: Trog's Tavern: Roman Numerals Are Dumb

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[Tourist Trap]

"So their minds are all twisted up that it's impossible for them to tell that they're miserable?"
Eu replies, sounding equal parts puzzled and disgusted. "That would have to take some pretty mighty mind-whammy magic. Can't you just break whatever your mother did and let things run their natural course? Or is it deeper than that?"

It sounds to Eu like this was a complete erasure of part of a person. Like a very specifically focused domination effect.

Just the thought of it makes her blood boil. Enslaving someone to wickedness like that is terrible.
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Re: Trog's Tavern: Roman Numerals Are Dumb

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Henry looks distinctly sad, fiddling with his sharky paws.
"...my girlfriend thinks I'm handsome. Or at least cute." he mumbles.
Besides Aivu, Elysium has that giant bug wrestler. He's ALSO a big round animal-person and he's definitely Elysian. Actually he might be bigger than Henry, since Henry's actually fairly normal human height.
"My name's Henry. I try to be a good person."
"...cocoa and chocolate are different. You'll want to find a magic garden that has chocolate trees. I'm sure somebody has those.It's the nexus after all.
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bc56
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Re: Trog's Tavern: Roman Numerals Are Dumb

Post by bc56 »

Tourist Trap
"It's deeper," Sekhmet sadly confirms. "My mother was immensely powerful. She didn't just implant new drives, she completely rewrote the mind. I don't know how to do it myself, and even if I did, I would need to be intimately familiar with the person's original personality to restore it... And I couldn't possibly do that for all my subjects, none of whom I met before their deaths and subsequent alterations. Their original selves are worse than dead." She looks forlorn. "No, I need another way. To change their minds while they're still the people they are now, without, uh, changing their minds." That's a bit of an awkward phrasing, but hopefully it gets the point across.
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Rebonack
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Re: Trog's Tavern: Roman Numerals Are Dumb

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"Is your girlfriend a fish, too?" Aivu asks curiously, then follows up with, "Aaww, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to make you sad. But not everything has to look pretty! Like flies and slugs and ugly people! They're all still important."

That probably isn't helping, Aivu.

"One of my friends says the most important thing is how beautiful you are on the INSIDE! And he wasn't talking about what color your tongue is, either. But it helps if your tongue IS a pretty color! Mine's a pretty pink color like most tongues."


[Tourist Trap]


"What a mess," Eu says with a sigh. "Well, if you like I can ask some of my... umm... friends. Who definitely aren't gods. If they've got any ideas? Normally there are rules about interfering but I don't think that counts if it's a totally different cosmology and honestly I'm sure pretty much anyone with a good heart would be just as horrified about this as I am."
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