Apocalypse Junction

[Earl of Purple]

Somewhere in the Desert

"Help, help! Please, I can't see, and I'm scared. My foot's in a trap, can you get me out?" The figure stops waving her arms, instead lowering them to pull at her robes. Her feet are bare, and a rather vicious-looking beartrap is fastened around her left ankle. There doesn't seem to be much blood, however, and this close there's a bad smell. It's trying to cover that with its telepathic lure, but the smell of old meat is quite pervasive. Another clue is that this isn't all it seems is if Hoshiki blinks; the figure remains visible even if his eyes are closed.

[Hraithre]

[Somewhere in the Desert]

A bear trap, in these conditions, would also cause a debilitating or even lethal wound, yet previously the swordsman sensed no immediate threat to this creature's life. A very big life, hidden in the sand. It's quite apparent to him now that he is dealing with some kind of a trapper, but it does not answer his question. "Drop the act. I asked, what are you?", he tries again, "You do hear me, yes?" He's not completely certain of that. This lure is some kind of a mental suggestion. He's not even sure if the creature knows what he is seeing - the female figure could all be in his head, created from his memories. Hoshiki lowers a hand to the hilt of his swords, rustling the sand with his feet, trying to feel if something beneath is moving.

[Rebonack]

[Green Goo]

Thaddeus shakes his head sadly.

"They're already dead. Better to just burn these things so this place can't use them against anyone else. Thank you for freeing me from the slime so I didn't suffer the same fate," the archer says. "I don't think I want them to be..."

He gives Eesha a sidelong glance.

She's currently busy chasing her tail in circles.

"No offense," he adds to Rowan.

As for the tunnel? Mariblex has plenty of experience with delves! It's all too clear what this is. "Oh, the king slime was a load-bearing boss and the wall fell in when we beat him to reveal this secret passage!"

That doesn't make any sense.

But then again, dungeons ARE strange places.

"We'll have to see what the end-chamber looks like to know for sure what kind of layout we're working with," Mariblex says as they climb through the open passage and pick up the fallen crown. "The city is over-run with green slime. But I see all SORTS of different slime roots in here. They must be coming from somewhere else."

[Gold]

Ruined Motorway- Rapid Robots

The markings are there, but painted on and faded, a bit hard to make out. Though not as hard as a captcha, so there's that going for TALBot.

Inside the open-door car, the seats are disintegrating from exposure to weather. The car's keys are visible in the footwell, however, alongside a battered old rucksack and a metal jerry can. Whoever was driving it isn't present any more, however.

The metal tripod is very tall, and this close TALBot can see the legs have some telescoping ability- the cab is five metres up, and could be both higher and lower. There's no response to the knocking, and no clear way up- presumably the pilot (if it has one) could lower the vehicle to make egress easier. For now, though, there's a window cleaner's van not too far away; the driver had tried to escape the jam by driving off the road and through a crash barrier that proved sturdier than expected. That has an aluminium ladder on its roof rack.

[Ruined Motorway- Rapid Robots]

TALBot notes the jerry can and rucksack, but doesn't stop to investigate either. His car only takes premium petrol, and either way he can come back later if he's still curious.

Looking up at the unresponsive metal structure from directly in front of it, TALBot thinks that it seemed taller from further away. He then takes a step back and looks around for any sign of ownership, but finds a conveniently placed ladder instead. Of course, TALBot can both hover and teleport, but his energy stores are just low enough that he would reconsider needless waste (which maybe conjuring a bazooka might have been, but that's neither here nor there), so instead he unclips and/or unties the ladder from the roof rack and drags it over to the tripod before propping it up against one of its telescopic legs with a degree of clumsiness. It's been a while since TALBot's climbed a ladder, and even longer since he's put one up. Both those timers are about to be reset, though, as TALBot climbs up and peers into the top of the hemispherical structure, not completely sure what he's expecting to find inside.

[bc56]

Green Goo
"There's only one way to find out," Mariblex descends cautiously into the tunnel, leading the way, because being already a slime and lacking any vital organs, they can much more easily survive whatever trap might be laying in wait.

[Keeper]

Green Goo

Rowan gives Thaddeus a sad nod. It was only an offer. He’ll burn anything Thaddeus wants them to, even his friends’ equipment if that’s what he wants. It was probably all magic to still be whole but it’s his call.

Then he can carefully follow Mary. And retrieve Ratticus who was lugging that valuable silver lock box around.

[Rebonack]

[Green Goo]

Heading down the tunnel, our heroes will thankfully NOT be attacked by anything gross on the way in. Sure it smells bad and looks creepy but that's just par for course when exploring dungeons, right?

Okay this is a palace, not a dungeon, but YOU KNOW.

Reaching an inner chamber beyond the hallway, our heroes will encounter a number of unusual sights. The first is a flight of stairs leading down into the catacombs. Kind of weird that there would be some of those back here but it isn't THE most questionable architecture one might find. More interestingly, though, is the door. There's a faint shimmer to it, not quite a portal, but certainly the veritable jungle of fungus and slime that grows beyond doesn't look like it belongs here. A heavy metal grate is sealed over it, barring entry to people who are NOT made of goop but allowing the diverse slime roots to grow through unhampered.

To the right of the gateway stands a statue of the king slime, bereft of his crown.

To the left of the gateway stands a statue of the queen slime, likewise crownless.

"You know we've often wondered if the Nexus changes abandoned places like these to make them more delve-," Mariblex wonders aloud. "This looks like a place where the Slime Pits are oozing into the material plane. There's probably a riftstone deeper in keeping the connection going. We could probably ooze through the portcullis but I don't think Rowan can."

Unless Rowan can turn himself into sapient custard filling.

[bc56]

Green Goo
"It looks like we're supposed to put the crowns on those statues?" Mariblex suggests. "I think we'll find the other crown in the catacombs, right?" That seems likely. At the suggestion of possibly squeezing through the bars, "You can't turn into dough or something, right?"

[Keeper]

Green Goo

Rowan goes looking for where the slime king’s crown went bouncing off to. Seems like it’s relevant now.
”Well, Ratticus could probably squeeze through it. Or maybe not.” Ratticus is rather fat. Comes with working for someone who constantly makes snacks bigger than you. Or maybe he’s simply reflecting his master?
”I’m not really interested in re-trying the transport muffin, so no. Do you think we have to search the vaults for another king?”

[Rebonack]

[Green Goo]

Sounds like Rowan can't turn himself into sapient cake batter.

That's really a shame.

The crown is right there, though. Quite easy to pick up! Not a problem at all.

"Oh no, not a king. It's the QUEEN slime! See-" Mariblex points at one statue with a tentacle. "That one has a mustache so it must be the king. THAT one has a hair bun, so it must be the queen."

Very simple!

It's unclear why the slimes have hair.

Maybe whatever foul forces from the underworld created them just have a very strange sense of humor.

"We'll find the queen of slimes down in the vaults, I'm sure of it. Probably somewhere toward the middle since we didn't get in very far coming from the other direction," Mariblex recalls.

[bc56]

Green Goo
"Let's go then," Mariblex begins climbing down the stairs towards the vaults.
"The sooner we deal with this slime pit, the sooner we can sort out the treasure and get turned back to normal." At that thought, Mariblex does their best to look at themselves; since their main ocular organ is in the center of their body, this means they're only using their eyespots. "... Our mum is going to kill us." They can't go a month without being turned into something else.

[Keeper]

Green Goo

”Well, don’t give up just yet. Maybe we’ll find a wish gem in here somewhere.”
Rowan would probably give it to Thaddeus since his friends aren’t still up and talking unlike Mary. But he wouldn’t say that.
Rowan will stay behind Mariblex as they explore. It feels weird since he’s pretty much twice as big as anyone else here. But that’s how the skill sets worked out.

[Rebonack]

[Green Goo]

Oddly enough a slime dragon's core is in their head. About the same with slime zombies, too. The more you know!

None the less, Mariblex looks like a cute green slime dragon! A little bit bigger than earlier in the day, mostly because they absorbed the mass of slime that was previously a succubus princess. Surely their mum wouldn't be TOO upset, right?

She might be more upset that they flaked on a royal appearance and saddled Bella with it so they could come here to paint.

"No, no wishes," Mariblex repeats again. "If we're going to get changed back it won't be through wishes."

They're VERY certain about that point.

So.

Down into the catacombs. The descent doesn't take too terrible long and they emerge into an old arch-roofed chamber lined with little alcoves. Alcoves occupied by dark suits of armor. Two hallways lead away from the central room, one clogged with bulging slime growths that wriggle and jiggle as something within writhes around. The other hallway is thickly overgrown with powdery brownish mold growths.

"We have no idea what those blobs are," Mariblex says, gesturing at the slime cocoons. "But the brown stuff is definitely russet mold. If you breath in too much it'll germinate inside your lungs and grow into a tiny mushroom person that erupts out of your chest. It must have drifted in here from the Slime Pit."

Sounds like a good job for fire!

[Earl of Purple]

Somewhere in the Desert

"Why aren't you helping me? I'm hurt, and lost, and scared. Please help me." The figure begins to cry, sobbing disconsolately. There's not much movement beneath the sands. A faint shift as something vast breathes, but hard to notice. It notices Hoshiki's movement, though, and the figure looks up hopefully. "Can you get me out of here? I'm hurt, and scared. Please help me."

Probably not the response he's hoping for; perhaps it can't hear him. Or perhaps it can hear him, but isn't smart enough to know what the words it uses actually means.

Ruined Motorway- Rapid Robots Not Rabid, I keep wanting to make that joke

The ladder was clipped to the roof, and is easily freed. Climbing up is... no harder than TALBot expects, though the smooth metal shell of the tripod doesn't provide a firm anchor for the ladder so it might slip if he's not careful. Inside there's a large hammock-style seat and a large array of controls. A human-sized person sat in the machine would struggle to reach them all. There's an area behind the seat and controls where some kind of generator and engine sits, and also the vessel's long-dead pilot. They've been heavily scavenged, so little remains; a large non-humanoid skeleton, a large ribcage, shoulders, shrunk and atrophied arms but large hands with a number of excessively long multi-jointed fingers. The skull takes up a lot of space, stretching back along the vertebrae, and has a pair of large eye sockets and an immense cranium for a vast brain. There's no teeth in its mouth, and barely a lower jaw. The dead Martian doesn't leave many clues as to how it died, but die it did, a long time ago.

[bc56]

Green Goo
"Let's burn through the mold and go that way," Mariblex suggests, and, barring further interference, they do so.

[Keeper]

Green Goo

"Well, I have lungs so I'll be behind you while you burn it."
Just in case.
"If you want Thaddeus you can stay behind. Ratticus can keep you company." He doesn't want to force the chubby archer into a hellish slime pit trek.

[Rebonack]

[Green Goo]

"If it's all the same I think I'll stay back here," Thaddeus yells from the throne room. He figures that he isn't in good shape right now and better safe than sorry.

As for our heroes?

They burn a few vary obviously once corpses to clear the path forward. Thankfully there aren't many and the highly flammable mold burns vigorously. Before long the tunnel widens out slightly into a sort of stepped pathway with two more tiers of walkways above. Water trickles down from the 'steps' sloshing around the feet of our heroes.

Then?

"YUB NUB!" comes a harsh, wheezing voice from above. A quartet of mold men loom above our heroes on the higher steps, bows drawn. The fungal creatures have a powdery look to them, like lichen on a stone. One is riding a dog sized salamander like creature with unnervingly long legs.

"Yub nun shooka!" the mounted mold man says, gesturing aggressively with his spear.

[bc56]

Green Goo
Oh great those are the mold guys.
They don't look too dangerous. They're so tiny!
Mariblex takes in a deep breath... And roars, a loud draconic sound. It comes out a little weird and burbly due to their slime anatomy, but that should scare the little guys off right?

[Keeper]

Green Goo

Rowan sighs. It's always something, isn't it? He always dreamed of going on a real life adventure, but he didn't realize how much of it was wading through slime and having weird things constantly trying to stab you and less discovering cool shiny things and temples.
He pulls another cookie from his pocket and devours it in two bites. The air shimmers around him, forming a misty aura around him.

[Rebonack]

[Green Goo]

"Eikea!"
"Eikea eikea!"
"Lave noosoo!"

The three bow wielding mold men are terrified! The drop their bows on the spot and flee, waving their arms in panic above their heads! The mounted mold man is doing his best to control his mount and is MOST successful. He shakes his spear at the fleeing archers and yells invective after them. Rounding on our heroes, he makes a servile gesture toward Mariblex and then points his spear at Rowan.

"Ek yunool, ek shooka?"

Mariblex is definitely a bit puzzled here. Obviously they don't speak mold man, but the idea the little guy is trying to get across seems... mostly clear maybe?

"I think he's giving us a pass but he still doesn't like you, Roawn," Mariblex says. "You'll have to do something to ear his respect, otherwise you're just an animal for growing mold in."

What could Rowan do to earn the respect of the mold man leader?

[Keeper]

Green Goo

"Animal? Yeesh."

Rowan steps up and gives a performative blast of fire into the air as well. Surely that will impress the mold people like it did with Mariblex?

[Rebonack]

[Green Goo]

Yeah we're talking mold people here. Everything from flatworms to humans are animals to them. As distinct from the wide variety of fungus folk. Or slimes like Mariblex. Slimes can't be used to grow spores but they are still considered potentially hostile rivals.

So!

Fire breath.

"Esh esh haa!" the mold man says, backing away fearfully. After regaining his composure he gestures to our heroes and says "Nook!" as he rides away.

After a gew steps he looks back and gestures to follow with his spear. "Nook! Nook!"

And then off he goes!

Should our heroes choose to follow they'll be lead back towards a mold man village where huts have been built of fungal filaments and mud mixed with dried slime. At the center of the village is a crude statue of what must be the SLIME QUEEN with a gold crown perched atop it.

[bc56]

Green Goo
"There it is!" Mariblex points out the crown. They were expecting having to fight the queen slime for it. "We need that," They say to their guide, pointing to the crown.
It's shiny and on display at the center of the village; it seems likely they'll have to either fight all the little guys or find a way to convince them to part with it.

[Keeper]

Green Goo

Rowan starts digging through his bag again.
"I could offer a trade?" he suggests, getting out more cookies. "Do mold people eat?" He doesn't think so but...

[Rebonack]

[Green Goo]

"Yeah, they eat. Stuff they swallow gets mold growing through it," Mariblex helpfully informs Rowan.

When they indicate the crown the mold men seem to confer with one another and several hurry off into the largest hut. Shortly there after they emerge carrying a palanquin with THE FATTEST mold man ever sitting atop it. The corpulent creature is decked in gold, jewels, and painted beads. Clearly the leader of this little village.

"I am Tulg, elder of village. Tulg speak Mannish to great dragons."

You hear that, Rowan?

You're a great dragon now!

Really moving up in the world.

[Ironsmith]

[Abandoned Motorway - Camp]

"Something alive hasn't gotta be people," Khannie points out, a little exasperated. "There are animals and stuff out in the wastes, too."

Like rabbits!

And coyotes!

Some of them even aren't horrible radioactive mutants.

Khannie's ears swivel this way and that.

Are there any birds around? If one's close enough she could probably snag it with her magic.

Abandoned Motorway- Alice's Camp

"I'd normally go with, but, uh, I'm... not exactly fit to do so right now." Because of the arrow in her gut.

There may well be birds nearby, but being Ironsmith's campsite I'll let him decide if so and what.

[Abandoned Motorway - Camp]

As if in answer to Khannie's unspoken question, there's a little kaw-ah from just behind the truck, as a small crow stumbles into view. At least it looks a little like a crow. The two heads make it defy the traditional classification just a bit, as well as the conventional wisdom about two being better than one, as they're presently engaged fighting over a worm and don't seem to notice the entire campsite staring at them.

[Rebonack]

[Abandoned Motorway - Camp]

Oh hey look.

Arguably the most unlucky bird in the area.

You would think that they would stay away because of Yatos but apparently not.

Khannie lights her horn and aims to snag the creature and haul it over to herself. Once it's close (but out of pecking range) she'll give it a bit of a shake. "Hey. You aren't a talking bird are you?"

She definitely feels like that's an important first step before feeding a bird to someone.

If it turns out that the bird is not, in fact, a talking bird she'll see if the vampire'll eat crow. If not, then Khannie probably owes the bird(s?) an apology.

[bc56]

Green Goo
"We need that," Mariblex points out the crown. "What will it take for you to give it to us?" They're being straightforward and to the point here. They came here more or less under truce, it wouldn't be nice to eat the chief, even if it would cow the others inti giving them what they want.

[Keeper]

Green Goo

Rowan's not gonna comment on that. He's in no position to comment on anyone's weight.
"I could provide you with foods that would make you stronger." he offers, since that is realistically the only thing he has to offer mold people. They're not interested in silver or chef's hats.

[Earl of Purple]

Abandoned Motorway- Alice's Camp

Harmony sits back and watches as Khannie catches a two-headed crow. That bit attracts some attention, but not enough to save the bird from its grisly fate- if the strigoi decides to feed.